As many of you know, Tim is waging an unfair embargo against Mark for the simple offense of not having asked how his day was. Not only is it fickle, but it also smacks of a 90s made-for-tv movie starring that dude who played Balki on Perfect Strangers. I refuse to respect Tim's picket-line and will therefore continue to write about my erstwhile number two and newly-crowned number one friend Mark.
Who, incidentally, called me the other day.
Mark: Hey, Anthony. I left some leftovers out on the table. Can you put them away for me?
Anthony: I threw them away.
Mark: WHAT?! That was steak!
Mark's Mom in the Background: He threw it away?!
Anthony: It was sitting out in the living room for three days. You can't eat it.
Mark: My mom says it will still be good.
Anthony: Mark, I know you love your mother, but you can't eat meat that has been at room temperature for three days.
Mark's Brother in the Background: Is it still in the trash?
Mark: Is it still in the trash?
Anthony: I'm not pulling a three-day-old steak out of the trash, Mark.
Mark: Ooooo man! You're killing me.
Anthony: We're done here, Mark. And remind your Mom to send all of her dirty pictures to my gmail account, NOT my work email.
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